How Someone Else Crapped On Emily’s Pants

I left her with the baby so I could drive half a mile to pick up her sister after track practice.  She runs in circles, but asking her to walk home is just too much.  I guess.

Five minutes later I open the door to a horrible scene.  Emily has the baby on the floor with his pants off and is yelling “He shit on my pants!”

And the couch.

And the floor in front of the television.

And his own pants.

And sweatshirt.

How did all this happen?

She was holding him when she felt something warm running down her leg, ran to the living room, sat him on the floor so she could find a blanket to put him on, and was trying to figure out how to change him without spreading it further.  This explains everything EXCEPT the couch.  My only guess is that while running by, somehow the poop shot out and landed on the couch.

Centrifugal force?


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