He said “You park like Haley.” This is one of the worst insults of my life especially since I had parked the car really straight behind my work building. Something about how the wheels were turned in the wheel wells, BLAH,BLAH,BLAH . . . I stopped paying attention at this point.
Really, I am proud to be completely unconcerned about how I park since I decided to become my like my good friend, Tarri, in her wild abandonment of straight parking expectations. I used to look out my kitchen window at all the pretty new vehicles lined up on the street outside my house and snicker at Tarri’s completely crooked mess of a parking job. How FREEING it must be to park all Helter Skelter like that!
And so when I returned the car to the house this evening I not only parked 3 feet from the curb and crooked, I also left Kanye West singing Golddigger at the top of his lungs, so that he will be shocked into never again complaining about a couple of inches one way or the other. When he thinks about the CAR he will be traumatized and start to shake and be grateful that his heart is still in good condition.