There is only one place I am every really alone. But I still hear a child’s voice yelling “Mom!” even if they are all at school and daycare . . . and I cringe and hurry up what I’m doing and stop trying to deep breathe and concentrate on the spot that I killed a huge hairy spider on after walking over it while brushing my teeth and using a long stick and paper from a lint roller to stick it long enough to flush it, and then I think about how I flushed it down the very place where I’m now sitting and I realize I am not meditating so much as worrying about it crawling back out. But that’s the longest period of peace I get in one day.