How People Find My Blog

One thing I love about wordpress is that it gives me a list of the things people search for in search engines when they stumble upon my blog.  Some of them are the usual things:  single mothers, kinds of therapy, Sandra Bullock, child support, and wedding crap.

And some of them are wicked funny (and copied and pasted here):

villiage of midgets vermont

Is there a village of midgets in Vermont?  I guess if I was a midget I would want to live with other people like me.  But then I would also be afraid of getting lost in high snowbanks, so I would pick somewhere a little more  friendly, like Florida.

hippie bugs yes or no question

I vote YES.  That would be cool. 

at the moment it’s side by side, but cou

Oh, yes the stupid Facebook virus.  Your search engine bar needs more spaces.  I could never use it to look for things like “grasshopper invasion of Wyoming this summer” or Johnny Depp is the coolest hatter on the face of the planet.”  I think of it as just helping with the google suggested searches.

” “the color thing got the boys so riled

Or so you’d like to think.  I don’t know any boys who didn’t just think it was completely idiotic and helped to shore up the stereotype that they are the smarter gender.

social security for midgets

I would assume this would be just like social security for everyone else, and not special for midgets.  I mean, if they get extra money just for being short then I should get extra for having three teenage daughters because that’s MORE of a handicap.

on top,side by side,give it to me straig

I really think this was just a cheap thrill for women who don’t ever talk about sex and could do it more anonymously on Facebook.

how many children are raised by single m

Now I am curious about this “M” who has kids.  Is she embarrassed to give us her full name?  Hi M, I’m K and I’m a single mother too.

autistic midget bookseller kidnapped

This is my favorite!  Not only is the midget also autistic, but he is the most unlucky midget EVER because he just got himself kidnapped.  Although I also feel sorry for the kidnappers because they wanted some rich kid to ransom and mistakenly took a midget who also lacks social skills.  Give him back!

midget goes to jail crimes

Now is it a crime to put a midget in jail, or are we looking for villianous midgets?  I wonder if they do more of some crimes than others, because in my head midgets are very upright citizens who would never commit crimes.  They are also very friendly and mostly cheerful all the time.  It would just be too sad to find a depressed midget.  I wouldn’t be able to handle it.

fans chat and dating costa rica

This one confuses me.  What are you fans of?  How do you date a country?  Are you thinking of dating everyone in that country at the same time?  Like a Bachelor show?  And how did you find my blog, because I think all I’ve ever said about Costa Rica is in a tag line about how I’d rather be there than here in Northeastern Vermont.  If you googled Costa Rica I would be on page 674 I’m sure.

hippie midgets in space

Okay, I still love Muppets in Space, except that Gonzo was sad about his family.  Is this an idea for a new show?  Hippie Midgets and Muppets Lost In Space.  I’m all over that!

“my nose pierced” “my children”

Someone sure uses alot of quotation marks.  But it still seems like two separate things.  Unless it’s not.  “My nose pierced my children” would be just an awesome thing to google.

midget dwarf fuck a teen girl

Just WRONG.  I am just disturbed that my blog came up.  Ewwwww.

hippie alice in wonderland

Alice is pretty hippie anyway.  All the colors, the high cat, the tea party, it’s all one big TRIP.  I don’t think it could get more hippie without destroying the plot entirely because IT DOESN’T HAVE ONE!

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